Wednesday, March 4, 2009

My new Career

Every now and then, I toy with the idea of going back to school. I really enjoyed college and I love learning new things. But I never know what to study. Should I further my career in health care with a BA in administration? Should I venture into completely new territory? Maybe just study silly stuff like, I dunno, spelling.

Well, finally, someone has come up with a degree I am fired up about!!

Liverpool Hope University has developed a Masters Degree in The Beatles!!!!!

I cannot make this stuff up!
A spokesperson for the University says students "will study the band's music as well as how it was influenced by the city of Liverpool."

I am so excited!! I figure we'll move to Liverpool and I'll study the Fab Four get a Masters Degree and then work...um...maybe....a record store?

OK, Clearly I still need to work out the kinks in my plan, but hey, It's THE BEATLES!!!!!
Whoa-hoo!!!

If you're interested (who wouldn't be?!?!) here's the link to the University.
http://www.hope.ac.uk/frontpage-news/hope-launches-worlds-first-beatles-ma.html

Maybe I'll see ya there.....

Monday, February 2, 2009

UFC number....uh....whatever.

Saturday night, J and I watched the UFC fights together. I know what you're thinking. And, yes, usually J tends to dictate what we watch on TV, but I actually do like watching the fights. It's kind of a sick thing for me.
I also have a tendency to laugh at people when they fall or run into things.
But I ALWAYS make sure they are OK!
Well, OK...as soon as I stop laughing I make sure they're OK.
But still....it's the thought, right?

Any hoodle.

So with that in mind, this is my take on the UFC fights.

The first fight was between Nate what-his-nose and Guida something.
Or should I say whats-his-ears. Seriously, the kid has some big ears!
And what was with Guida's hair?! Was he trying to look like a neanderthal?
The fight was pretty boring. Guida was all over Nate like a monkey (hhmmm, maybe that's the look he was going for) but he never did any damage, (I kept picturing Nate saying "Dude, get OFF me!") so I was surprised that it went to Guida in decision. Especially since he showed a clear lack of manners by burping between every round!! Gross!! Dude, you're on national TV! Act like a grown up!

The next fight was between Karo and Dong (seriously, that's his name!) I don't have much to say about this one. There was no blood on the mat, so it was pretty much a boring fight. It went to decision. I forget who won.

I should mention here that J was telling me about each fighter before the matches. He's so sweet, he thinks I'm gonna remember all that for my blog, or worse, write it down.
Clearly I didn't.
After a bit, he just started to sound like the teacher from Charlie Brown (wah, wah, wah, wah) but he did try.

The third fight was between Bonnar and Jones. It was here that I started to wonder how fighters get their nick-names. I mean, "The American Psycho" Bonnar? Seriously? More like "Mr. Rogers" Bonnar, or "Mild Mannered" Bonnar. He looks like you're average Joe neighbor. Just a nice guy. But then again, so did Ted Bundy. Hmm, maybe that is a good nick-name for him in a weird-six degrees of separation-kind of way.
Where was I? Oh yeah... the fight was boring, and went to decision AGAIN! Jones won.

These people know we paid money to see a fight, right?!

The next fight was between tattoo guy and guy-with-eyes-on-his-butt. At this point, I have become bored and I was folding laundry. So I was a bit distracted and my mind began to wander. This is a small sample:
I wonder who picks the song they walk in on...They should really do away with all that nonsense, it just takes up too much time...Who writes up what the announcer says about each fighter, if it's the fighter, clearly some have a much bigger ego than they deserve....They should run the whole thing more like a three ring circus. Once one fight is over, the lights dim on that ring and they move quickly on to the next ring where the fighters are already in the ring waiting to fight. The announcer says something like "this is Bob and This is Joe. OK, fight" . And if the winner takes too long "thanking" everyone he ever met than the theme music playes and they cut the mic. Wow, would that go a lot faster, then I wouldn't have to stay awake 'til all hours. Oh, I think I'm onto something here, I should write Dana White a letter. I'm sure he'll listen to me...

Anyhoo.

Tattoo guy won that fight with a nice knockout punch to eyes-on-his-butt guy right at the end of the first round (I think it was the first round. Whatever). I mean right at the end of the round! Like, as the bell was ringing. I thought it was kinda unfair, really. Here's poor eyes-on-his-butt guy, thinking the round is over and he can relax for a sec, when BAM!, the next thing he remembers is wondering why everyone is cheering and he's laying on the ground. Ah, well.

The next fight was the main event between Penn and St. Pierre. I should tell you that I can not stand BJ Penn! I think he is a giant butt! He's arrogant, rude, spoiled and...well...I can't think of any more adjectives right now, but you can add your own here_______. J was sure that Penn was going to win.
I tried to tell him how wrong he was, but you know men.
He was all "No, Penn is gonna kick GSP's butt!! blah, blah, blah"
Clearly I am much better at calling fights!
Still, I was disappointed in the fight. I was expecting more of a brawl, and it was just a bad beat down. I don't think Penn knew what to do! I could tell in the first round he was in trouble. He had a "holy crap!" look on his face almost the entire fight.
That is, when he was forming coherent thoughts.
Because after a while, he was probably just thinking "ow, ow, ow, ow...etc."
In the end, Penn's brother put a stop to the fight. I think it was the end of the 3rd or 4th round.

And then, the weirdest victory celebration I have seen in the ring ensued. GSP and some guys from his corner all locked arms and sang while doing some kind of Lord of the Dance thing.

Yeah. Not sure what all that was about.

My favorite fight of the night was my baby boy B against his arch nemesis, Giant Stuffed Potato Head. I'm proud to say that B won over and over again, taking his shirt off each time to fight and then putting his shirt back on when he won.
'cause, you know, that's what the fighters do!

So there ya'll have it. My version of what really happened on the UFC fights.
Admit it, mine was way better than J's.
Just kidding, hon.
(kinda)


If you want pics and statistics and boring stuff like that (like, you know, names) you should visit J's blog at www.the-bone-breaker.blogspot.com

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

my own 2008 awards

It has recently been brought to my attention that I have not been fulfilling my blogger duties. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
('cause, you know, I have nothing else to do)

It's not that I don't have anything to say (clearly) it's just that I'm not exactly a computer kind-of person. I'd rather just talk to people. Although I'm not really a phone person either. Or a letter/e-mail person. Basically I would like people to just go inside my head and get the info for themselves so i don't have to worry about it.
Oh. Wait. That might be a really bad idea. I've been in there and it's. . . well, not for the faint of heart!

So, I have been trying to thing of what to write about. There has been so much to tell since my last blog on Nov 10 (geez, has it really been that long?!?!?) I thought I would take/steal/borrow an idea from the hubby.

I know that a lot of people read J's horror blog.
(ya freaks!)
Just kidding. (kinda)
Anyhoober, He recently gave out his own awards for movies, books, TV, etc. Now, I don't have anything as cool as his "skull" awards, but I'm sure if I scrounge around I could find something to give out. Like, I dunno, some leftovers?

So, here they are. The leftover awards. Or, whatever.

The award for "Best impersonation of an ostrich" goes to the gal at the local Dairy Queen. After 15 minutes and several attempts at putting in our coupon for a free cone , she finally just gave up, went to the back of the store and didn't come back out again!!!! The family and I stood there waiting while another employee help several customers. Finally, after everyone else had been helped and left the store, I said, "um, do you think you could help us? I don't think that girl is coming back out."

The "Somebody must have beat you with a stupid stick" award goes to the patients mom who, under the question "patients state of health", she wrote Wisconsin. I can't make this stuff up people.

The "Out Of The Mouths of Babes" award goes to my own baby girl, S. After J. took a turn too fast on an icy road and careened out of control crashing into a ditch (ok, ok, it wasn't that dramatic, but I am allowed to embellish a bit, right? right?) S. looked up at him in her most serious 4-year-old voice and said, "Daddy, do you think it would be ok if mom drove home?" ah, that's my girl ;-)

Coincidentally, whenever J. drives, she now tells him what a good job he did not crashing. (snicker, snicker)

The "Unbelievable Bureaucratic Red Tape" award goes to the FL DMV for taking almost 6 months, about 100 phone calls, 5 FedEx packets and at least a dozen faxes to get our tags for the truck. No one seemed to know what to do because we were out-of-state and I got a different story from everyone. I even had one woman tell me I should mail her a blank check because she wasn't sure how much it would be. Um. No.

The "Fictional Character I wish Was Real" award goes to Edward Cullen from the Twilight series. (sigh) He is, in my humble opinion, the perfect man. You know, except for the whole flesh-eating-vampire thing. He's chivalrous, protective (but not in a obsessive-creepy way) funny, romantic, sincere, affectionate. . .(sigh). He is, in fact, so perfect in my mind, I couldn't even bring myself to see the movie. I was worried that their Edward would not be as perfect as My Edward. (sigh)

The "Oh Pah-leeze!" award goes to my very own hubby for thinking he has gained weight because his waist size went up to a heart stopping 29! Yep, that's right. 29 inches. Whew! I think I'll just start calling him "Hubs the Chubs" from now on.

The "Worst Weatherman Ever" award goes to our local guy here in Wisconsin. His predictions go something like this:
"well, it may snow tonight or tomorrow, or it may snow this weekend".
Gee, ya think? Gosh, it's only winter in Wisconsin. What are the odds it's gonna snow? Freaky!

And finally, the "Holy Cow, What have I Gotten Myself Into" award goes to me.
(I can so do that 'cause it's my Blog!)
Ya'll know we extended here through the winter. Yeah, I don't know what I was thinking either.

Each morning when I get up and it's below zero, I feel like I should get some kind of award. It doesn't need to be a big deal, a small trophy of some sort will do. Something about the self sacrifice I make each day as I venture out in the Frozen tundra and walk 10 miles uphill to work and back while carrying food on my back for the homeless and . . .oh, ok, fine, That might be a little exaggeration. It's only 5 miles to work. ;-)

Temp this morning: -2
where's my trophy?